baby e's growth

Elise's Birth Story

3:21 PM
Moms usually write their birth experiences very shortly after giving birth, but because I'm unfashionably late, here's what I remember about that fateful day I first met my daughter a year ago.

19/10/2015, 10+pm 

I was 39 weeks, 3 days pregnant and rushing out a difficult Korean to English patent translation (Composition of Portulaca Extract and its Anti-Obesity Effect -_-). I knew I would surely miss the deadline if Elise came out before I finished translating the document, so I told her to "come out after I complete my work". 

Strangely or miraculously, she listened because my tummy started to hurt after I clicked "Send". My pregnancy was extremely smooth. I had no problems eating (except for the first trimester) and she never ever kept me awake at night so it was my first disrupted sleep. 

20/10/2015, 5.30 pm

I continued to hurt throughout the night and throughout the morning so I called the nurses at the delivery suite who told me to come down for a checkup. When I reached the waiting room at NUH, they checked and said I was only 3cm and I could choose to go home or be warded to wait it out. It felt like the worst menstrual cramps ever, like an invisible hand was wringing my uterus and it lasted for about a minute, fading away before the next wave. 

The next time they checked, I was 5cm and the staff whooshed me to the delivery suite. Along the way, I heard chilling screams from other women in labour and got a bit frightened. 

 I was first given laughing gas to take my mind off the pain. Laughing gas makes you feel floaty and high like your soul is floating, but the effect is short so it's not a painless option because you feel the full pain in between. It's actually a legal high. 

20/10/2015, 8pm

After an hour or so, the nurses checked again and this time, I was 9cm and the nurses went into alert mode. One of them reached in, broke the water bag and exclaimed "IT'S GREEN! THAT MEANS THE BABY POOPED INSIDE! PUSH NOW!" Apparently, it is dangerous if fetuses pass meconium in utero during delivery because there's a chance of them ingesting it. If so, they'll have to do an emergency C-section to get the baby out ASAP. They noticed that Elise's vitals were constant (meaning she didn't swallow her poop) so they allowed me to continue pushing. 

 Other than breathing in the laughing gas like crazy, I kept rubbing my feet against the sheets to take my mind off the pain. 

I huffed and I puffed and I squeezed. Pushing the baby out actually feels like doing a big poop. My husband who let me squeeze his hand was SO worried I would die because I was tired and couldn't reply to all his questions so he kept talking to me non-stop - "Can you hear me?! Please reply! Talk to me! I can't live without you!". Korean men are so dramatic. 

The medical officer (subsidised patients can't choose their gynaecologists) was preparing for an episiotomy when I shouted out "No no no noooo don't cut!". It's common practice to cut the vagina to allow for a bigger opening. So he listened and at one point, they could see her head and asked if I wanted to touch it. I don't remember if I felt grossed out or too tired but I didn't. 

After a few more pushes, I heard a cry and did a few more pushes to deliver the placenta, which the nurse asked if I wanted to dabao (take away). Err, no thank you. Luckily, I didn't tear much and only needed a few stitches.

The First Meeting

When the nurse carried her to me, the first thing I said was "Hey! She has a dimple!". I didn't cry or particularly feel overwhelmed by emotions though. I also noticed she came out really clean! I guess drinking coconut water really helped in "cleansing" the baby. 
So clean! The coconut water must have helped.

We were left on our own for about an hour for skin-to-skin where she wriggled around and did a breast crawl. It's where the newborn sniffs around and latches by herself. Afterwards, we were pushed into the ward for a rest. 

The stitches didn't hurt much so I didn't even need painkillers. I've always liked babies so I was fascinated about her every movement. Newborn movements are jerky and sudden. They don't so much other than eating, sleeping and pooping. They also can't see very well so they tend to stare at you quizzically with furrowed eyebrows like "But.. who ARE you?" and that's when you tell them....
.
.
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"I am your mother". 


baby e's growth

This M word

1:01 AM
I've been a mother for close to 5 months now and it has already been a tremendous ride. I'm so blessed that Elise is easy to look after - she drinks her milk well, sleeps well, rarely cries, laughs a lot and generally doesn't cause us much worry. 


She can play quietly by herself in the cot without making noise and sit in her swing while we have our dinner for about 10 minutes. Once, I was using the computer and assumed she was sleeping. When I turned around, I saw her propping herself up in a tummy time position, staring at me quietly. It actually creeped me out a bit because she was so silent. 

 At a tender age of 5 months, she has gotten herself into a fair bit of trouble. Just a few days ago, I was carrying her whilst using the computer when she suddenly flung and smashed my cup full of orange juice onto the floor. 

Then she made a face as if to say, "That's what you get for ignoring me". 

This evening during her bath, she also slipped underwater for a second and drank a mouthful of bath water, (no) thanks to her father who insisted that she would be able to sit upright in the bath tub without support. She kicked and splashed, leaned back and slipped into the water. Of course, we immediately took her out, soothed her and now I have one win over my husband. "Told you to listen to me, right?" 

 We also bought her a small swimming pool which she hasn't learnt how to use properly yet. She does this instead: 

She makes us laugh a lot and we have definitely been a lot happier since she came into our lives. For one, my father smiles a lot more now and there seems to be more motivation for him to live.

Before she was born, I don't think my dad and I had too many interesting things to talk about - I'm not really interested in stocks and shares and he tells me about neighbourhood news like how the uncle living in our block has an unfilial son who made him pay money for a broken computer and how the neighbour's daughter-in-law is pregnant. We make each other bored. 


Over in Seoul where her paternal relatives are located, I hear they are only too excited to meet her. Apparently, many good things have happened since her birth, like a rise in the price of their land and a promotion. When I asked if they would attribute the recent bad event to her existence, my husband just shrugged me off. Only believe in the good things. 

Having a child distanced me from most of my childless friends. I can see why. Impromptu and spontaneous overseas trips which were a leave application and flight booking away have now become unthinkable. Late night chill out session at a bar listening to live music? The best place to chill out is at home now. Even weekday dinners are extremely difficult to commit to. 

On the bright side, some old friends came back and it made me realise how certain friends have been with me through all the ups and downs. I've also made more new friends, but unsurprisingly, most of them have children. I suppose it's like what they say - birds of a feather flock together. It's just easier for mummy friends to understand terms like BLW, MOTN, SIDS, DL, FM (not the radio frequency), EP (not a record), LO and talk about the colour of baby poop and brands of baby carriers and bottles. 

Everyone joins a band in this life. You are born into your first one. 

As life goes on, you will join other bands, some through friendship, some through romance, some through neighborhoods, school, an army. Maybe you will all dress the same, or laugh at your own private vocabulary. Maybe you will flop on couches backstage, or share a boardroom table, or crowd around a galley inside a ship. But in each band you join, you will play a distinct part, and it will affect you as much as you affect it.                     
- The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto, Mitch Albom 


When I announced my pregnancy, I had a (now ex-friend) friend comment that it was a very bad choice to have a baby because my career was non-existent and I was not "stable". I was so worked up arguing through WhatsApp with him. That's why he was kicked out of my band. 

 I don't regret it one bit, for the littlest member of my band welcomes me home like this every day:
baby e's growth

Baby's HEP B D2 jab

7:16 PM
Elise went for her immunisation jab today. It's not the first injection she's had, but the first one that we got to see.

I shielded her eyes away from the needle, but she felt the pain and WAILED for an entire minute, then sobbed some more after we exited the room...

sobbed pitifully for some more...


and then...


she dozed off from all that crying. 

She's currently 5kg (90% percentile) and 55cm (75% percentile). That's on the other end of the charts as compared to when she was in the womb where the hospital estimated her to be in the 19th percentile. As long as she's healthy. :)

baby e's growth

Elise is 1 month old!

9:50 PM

It's been one month since Elise was born. She is 8cm taller and 1kg heavier than her birth weight. She feels so huge already. One month ago, I was cradling her in the delivery suite and noticing how she had a very prominent dimple. She was placed on my chest and did the breast crawl. I'd read about it before, and was amazed to see her do it. 


 It has been quite a month. She is very vocal and lets us know when she dislikes something with a loud growl. When she dislikes something, she'll push away with her little (but very strong) arms and go "ERUGHH!" angrily. Other times, she squeaks, mews and does other cute sounds.
We have 3 adults tending to one little infant, and all of us have disrupted sleep. In the first two weeks, I felt like I was running on adrenaline. It's a lot better now that we've figured out her schedule, but now it still feels like there are so many things to do with so little time.
She likes looking at scenery and being carried by her grandfather. She likes bathing but hates changing in and out of clothes. 


 I love my little human. Pregnancy kind of ruined my body but it gave me this girl.